I have taken a week off work. I’m feeling burned out after two years of writing copy for an internet marketing company in which I write article after article about cars and trucks and SUVs. My soul has shriveled.
Today is the first day off. A month ago I knew that my spirit was seriously thirsty, that I was unfulfilled and made a pledge to “go deep” more often. To spend more time being spiritually present, to spend less time doing and more time being.
And yet as I look at the long list of things I’d come up with that “must be done” on this week away from work, I see what they truly are. An escape plan. They are all good things—cleaning the shed and the garage before winter, scheduling a teacher conference, making a lemon pie for my husband’s birthday, changing bank accounts—but they are “doing” things, not “being” things.
Why do I run from being? Why does the actuality of spending time in quiet, in solitude, waiting for Spirit to speak fill me with such antsy-ness and dread? I want to do, do, do because it feels good. It feels productive and gives my organized side a boost of energy and satisfaction. But what about the other side of me? The creative who needs silence to create? The soulful being that needs connection with a greater Presence? The child who needs quiet and time to dream? Why does the bossy organizer, the adult, the responsible drone, get to call all the shots?
Today, let’s consider the possibility that whatever we’re running from is exactly what we need. Quiet. Peace. Reflection. And the wisdom that comes from all three. Consider that what we truly need is not to check things off our list, but to just sit quietly and be open.